yeah, i don't know

[harborshore]

I didn't want to be right when I wrote that story. I was writing it so I would get the sheer possibility of it out of my head. It was good to write it, because I managed to give Bob and Brian a happy ending, but fuck, I really didn't want to be right. Goddammit. I don't know what to say about this. I don't even know how I feel about this.

I have a number of favorite things about Bob. The list starts like this:

1. He rescues dogs.

2. He's seriously fucking good at what he does.







Feel free to continue in comments. Videos, photos, favorite things about Bob. That's what I'd like to talk about today. Also, I need a hug. Who wants to have a cuddle party?

Comments

[delphinapterus.livejournal.com]

Bob's quiet competence when he talked about his drums. He and Brian still talk which is something I guess. I still don't know what to say really. {{hugs}}

[turlough]

I didn't turn on my computer until late today so I'm still in shock. And I hate what I see happening on my flist right now. I still love this band and I still love Bob.

[redbrickrose.livejournal.com]

*hugshugs* ♥

[novembersmith.livejournal.com]

[sullen-hearts.livejournal.com]

*Cuddles*

Stupid Bob stupid Bryar.

[sullen-hearts.livejournal.com]

I

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I <a href="http://likeitscool.livejournal.com/5955.html"wrote fic</a> about Bob and his socks. Maybe it can cheer you.

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

I knew, somehow, I was pretty sure it was true. Blame my cursed intuition when it comes to emotions, I guess. That's why I wrote the story I wrote, because I couldn't let go of it until I had, and now it's true, and--FUCK, Mel. He's really important to me. I'm so happy for everyone who can be sure they'll still love the band and be excited about it and feel like it's still the band--I don't know that I can. They're rerecording! He was really excited about the new album! FUCK. Honestly, I really mean that I'm happy for people, but I just--dammit, dammit, dammit.

At least we know Brian and him still talk. ;__;

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

He was really excited, Megan. Shit, this is upsetting.

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

I feel really lost right now. *clings*

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

Of course you can! *holds on tight*

I know! Like, talking about it with you and people here and writing and--but ugh, ugh, TORA.

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

I don't fucking know, but I was way too on with that story of mine to be comfortable. FUCK.

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

*clings* Shit, this is upsetting.

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

Yes, his quiet competence! I love that so much! And his little smile when he gets excited about it! And dude, that part is the only thing that made me really happy all day.

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

Honestly? I'm really happy for people who can say "At least the band is still intact" but I'm miles away from that. He's really important to me. Shit.

That picture is my other favorite. *points to icon* ♥

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

Goddammit, reality, why must you suck? ♥ *clings*

[wasoncedelight.livejournal.com]

I totally, TOTALLY understand. Bob IS very important, period. It won't be the same without him, none of it will, and while I'm glad and grateful that MCR is still trucking on, it hurts, too. I just hope they don't scrap everything they'd done with Bob, because that would just gut me even more, and I don't know if I could handle that.

And I know what you mean, about your story. R and I were talking last night about the one I *didn't* write, that we'd talked about a while back, about Bob having to leave the band. And on the one hand I'm so glad I never wrote it, but on the other, I'm morbidly tempted to do it now. IDK, maybe it would be cathartic. But I think it's too soon, in too many ways.

I am glad, though, to know that he and Brian are still friends. TBH I still haven't even gotten over Brian being gone, so this is a double whammy, but it does help a little, to know the two of them are still good.

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

YOU. *sniffles* ♥, a million of them. I--what the hell?

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

GODDAMMIT. MCR, why are you getting rid of my favorite?

*clings*

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

I've seen comparisons to when Matt left, and I'm just like, um, stop that right now. I feel really weird about them rerecording or doing new songs, because according to what we'd heard, the album was done, right? So they're taking away the music he was involved in, too? OW OW OW, that's really painful.

I'm glad it exists, because there's a happy ending, but I couldn't have written it, or, no, it would have turned out more mean if I'd known it really was true. It's like--I got angry when Brian left, because, you know, and I sort of got over that, but no, I didn't, and now all that hurt is coming back (thank god they still talk, that made me really happy).

Wow, incoherent. Also, wow, overinvested. Time to make dinner.

[nightlilac.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry honey, I couldn't bring myself to read your story at the time :/ I just think of Bob as this really wonderful grounding force within the band, you know? I hope the rest of them are all doing OK right now. Hugs for them and for you <3

[wasoncedelight.livejournal.com]

It DOES hurt that they're recording new songs, and as far as we knew they were done with the album, but I don't want to think it's about taking anything away from anybody. BRB, putting my blinders on. I just... I need to cling to SOMETHING, because this band means too much to me, and change is inevitable and I can't lose all of them. Not yet, not without knowing SOMETHING solid and not just speculating.

And of course the story would've turned out differently if you'd written it now. Be glad they got their happy ending, and know that their real-life friendship is still intact, and take the rest as it comes. ♥

[novembersmith.livejournal.com]

I have spent the last day in a huddle of misery over this. I need a cuddle party, stat. *clings*

And I have been poking through your comments, and yes yes yes, it's great some people are able to still be happy for MCR, but me, I am still reeling. BOB. BOB BRYAR.

Ugh, I am going to go stare more at the pics I posted of him with various things in his mouth. HOW CAN HE EVEN DO THAT WITH A CAN OF DIET COKE? Next time I have a can, I am trying that, and it is not going to be pretty, I can tell you that much. And how inappropriately hot is that smoking pic? SO HOT, AMIRITE?

[saekokato.livejournal.com]

This icon was made from what has to be one of my favorite pictures of Bob, aside from the one with Piglet. I just. He's smiling. I think this was the first time I'd ever had hard proof of him just looking happy. D:

I really wish I had found out about this after I'd come home from work, instead of before and at 3:30am to boot. I just. Bob. I'm stuck there.

I am totally down with the cuddle party right now. *hugs*

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

*clings right back*

He's kind of my favorite, you know? And, like, god, I'd just found those drumming videos from two months ago where he's all happy about the album and talking about adjustments because of his injuries, and-- ;__;

YES. To all of that. Except that if I try what he does with that can I'm convinced I'll break my retainer.

[harborshore.livejournal.com]

Dude, read it when/if you can, it exists to help. Don't read it if it won't.

Hugs, sweetheart. ♥