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harborshoreI'm getting a little tired, is the thing. Because I'm not fond of reading fic and being blindsided by the only woman appearing being an evil doctor or a shrewish girlfriend or, for that matter, the understanding girlfriend who gets out of the picture in order to further the love of our two heroes. Or the only girl dying. Or--you know. (Note: none of these examples are taken from a specific story. That's actually part of the problem--they're tropes. And I keep seeing them and many others and I'm so, so tired.)
I realize that it's hard. I realize our culture premiers the Stories of white dudes. I realize fandom is prone to writing m/m, and there is nothing wrong with that. I'm not asking for everyone to start writing femmeslash, no matter how happy that would make me. No, I'm asking for something much smaller.
As usual, I'm fine with being disagreed with: these are my opinions and I'm definitely wrong sometimes. I would ask that discussion is polite and respectful, with all that that implies.
1. Are there any? Any at all?
And I'm not just talking about the main characters--if you're writing Bob/Brian or Brendon/Spencer or Pete/Patrick or Frank/Gerard, I realize that unless you're writing genderswap, they'll be dudes. But it's worth it to look at the surrounding cast and see if all of them are men. Because the world doesn't actually look like that. Truth: I've had people tell me they stay away from stories about women because fandom is their escape from sexism. The thing is, erasure is nothing like enlightenment.
2. Are they the villains?
Believe it or not, if a story has, say, twelve characters, and the two women that appear are both evil/mean/careerist moms who don't care about their kid/abusive/or what have you, that looks a little weird. And it's really hard to read without flinching.
3. Are they the catalyst for the relationship of the two dudes?
This one, hmm. It's about what their purpose is in the story. I'm not saying the best friend of one of the guys can't go, "Call him, idiot," but there's a fine line between helping out a friend and existing solely to get the guys together. It's (in my head) especially problematic if they're dating one of the dudes already and then go, "No, I love you, of course it's okay for you to date him too." Meanwhile they're not interested in the second guy romantically, they're not portrayed as polyamorous, and their relationship with their boyfriend in question is largely absent from the story. That--it's not fair to them. It's fairly possible to deal with existing girlfriends in a way that doesn't suck, promise. And I'm not talking about OT3s, here, I'm talking about two relationships that intersect in a way that makes the woman unimportant.
4. Are they Bad Mothers?
Someone very smart once said to me that if a story explicitly tells us that it's fine for women to not want children but implicitly tells us that anyone who doesn't want a child is a bad person, then the explicit stuff matters less, because what we're shown is that people should want children. Note that I don't think that it's necessarily bad to write about a woman who doesn't want children or who is an actual bad parent, but maybe make sure that's not just counterpointed with dudes who want children and who are good parents?
5. Are they damsels in distress? Do they exist to provide the hero with an object to rescue? Do they have agency?
These ones should be self-explanatory: it's about whether the women can act instead of being acted upon, it's about whether they have a story independent of the heroes.
6. Are they people?
Because you know what? Sometimes I get to a female character in a story and I don't feel like I'm reading about a person, I'm reading about a caricature. There's the Scene Girl, there's the Dumb Blond, there's the Evil and Controlling Mom, there's the girl who exists to be supportive...so ask yourself, are they people?
I'm not saying this is a complete list (feel free to add more in comments), and it's possible I'll add others later when I think of them. Just, please, write me some women that don't make me flinch.
I realize that it's hard. I realize our culture premiers the Stories of white dudes. I realize fandom is prone to writing m/m, and there is nothing wrong with that. I'm not asking for everyone to start writing femmeslash, no matter how happy that would make me. No, I'm asking for something much smaller.
As usual, I'm fine with being disagreed with: these are my opinions and I'm definitely wrong sometimes. I would ask that discussion is polite and respectful, with all that that implies.
1. Are there any? Any at all?
And I'm not just talking about the main characters--if you're writing Bob/Brian or Brendon/Spencer or Pete/Patrick or Frank/Gerard, I realize that unless you're writing genderswap, they'll be dudes. But it's worth it to look at the surrounding cast and see if all of them are men. Because the world doesn't actually look like that. Truth: I've had people tell me they stay away from stories about women because fandom is their escape from sexism. The thing is, erasure is nothing like enlightenment.
2. Are they the villains?
Believe it or not, if a story has, say, twelve characters, and the two women that appear are both evil/mean/careerist moms who don't care about their kid/abusive/or what have you, that looks a little weird. And it's really hard to read without flinching.
3. Are they the catalyst for the relationship of the two dudes?
This one, hmm. It's about what their purpose is in the story. I'm not saying the best friend of one of the guys can't go, "Call him, idiot," but there's a fine line between helping out a friend and existing solely to get the guys together. It's (in my head) especially problematic if they're dating one of the dudes already and then go, "No, I love you, of course it's okay for you to date him too." Meanwhile they're not interested in the second guy romantically, they're not portrayed as polyamorous, and their relationship with their boyfriend in question is largely absent from the story. That--it's not fair to them. It's fairly possible to deal with existing girlfriends in a way that doesn't suck, promise. And I'm not talking about OT3s, here, I'm talking about two relationships that intersect in a way that makes the woman unimportant.
4. Are they Bad Mothers?
Someone very smart once said to me that if a story explicitly tells us that it's fine for women to not want children but implicitly tells us that anyone who doesn't want a child is a bad person, then the explicit stuff matters less, because what we're shown is that people should want children. Note that I don't think that it's necessarily bad to write about a woman who doesn't want children or who is an actual bad parent, but maybe make sure that's not just counterpointed with dudes who want children and who are good parents?
5. Are they damsels in distress? Do they exist to provide the hero with an object to rescue? Do they have agency?
These ones should be self-explanatory: it's about whether the women can act instead of being acted upon, it's about whether they have a story independent of the heroes.
6. Are they people?
Because you know what? Sometimes I get to a female character in a story and I don't feel like I'm reading about a person, I'm reading about a caricature. There's the Scene Girl, there's the Dumb Blond, there's the Evil and Controlling Mom, there's the girl who exists to be supportive...so ask yourself, are they people?
I'm not saying this is a complete list (feel free to add more in comments), and it's possible I'll add others later when I think of them. Just, please, write me some women that don't make me flinch.
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(no subject)
Date: 2010-07-02 07:27 pm (UTC)I really like a lot of canon het ships and it bugs me no end when a wife/girlfriend does the understanding thing to get the slash couple together. I think there are ways to write that trope so the story is well executed but it's something that I think would also be very difficult to do. In some ways I'm much happier if it's a magically wifeless/girlfriendless universe than one where the wives/girlfriends are treated as either villians standing in the way of the True Slash Love or the helpful catalysts to get the Slash couple to realize their True Love. However, that type of universe bugs me a bit too but I'm not sure how to explain why it does.
Yet, what really annoys me, even more than the badly done characterizations of wives/girlfriends, are the accusations that to write a wife/girlfriend - especially one without much known canon - is just the writer projecting themselves. The accusations of projecting are something I've run across in both RPF fandoms (for ex. in bandom especially with regard to Jamia and Alicia) and FPF fandoms (for ex. Lisa from Supernatural). It's only with female characters. There are male characters who get written about who have just as little known canon but I've yet to come across accusations that writers writing those male characters are just projecting themselves onto the character. I think this is maybe another facet of the Mary Sue debate?
As a writer I'm always worried that I won't write female characters as well as they deserve but at the same time I find that I really struggle with the idea that I might be writing a "Mary Sue" instead of a well-rounded interesting female character. I guess I just have to hope that if I blunder my flist/betas will tell me.
(no subject)
Date: 2010-07-06 10:12 am (UTC)However, that type of universe bugs me a bit too but I'm not sure how to explain why it does. I know what you mean--it bugs me because it's a form of erasure, especially because the end result often is a story without any women at all. But I hate the breakup/vilification fics so fucking much.
God, I know. Because no one ever wrote a basement!Gerard story that involved super!gorgeous Frank, right? Right.
As far as Mary Sues go, I mean, if you want to talk too-perfect-to-be-real characters, why isn't anyone complaining about certain portrayals of Spencer Smith? You know? But no, it's the women we complain about. I wouldn't worry much about whether you're writing Mary Sues--just apply the same principles as you do when writing male characters. Have them be normal, have them fuck up, have them be people.